What to do?

Trying to decide what to do. I think I want to go back to school, but don't know what for. I suppose I should talk to someone at the college and see what my options are. I think I would enjoy Occupational Therapy, but the local college only has a Physical Therapy program.. I gotta do something though... Get a new job or go to school to get a new job, doesn't really matter as long as I change direction from where I am... I love working with elderly people. I hate stupid politics that come from the office.. I don't understand why they continue to hire people when there are many people who work for them, already, that aren't getting as many hrs as they would like.. Including me! I hate feeling like crap every time I read the stupid news letter. It makes me feel even worse that I am not as happy for the people who get recognized, as I should be... I want to go to work and enjoy it, not feel used, abused, and a lot of times guilty... Guilty? yes... Although, my work charges about the same as a lot of other companies that provide the same service, it is still for an elite population... I suppose this is sort of out of my control because, like I said, my work doesn't really charge more than other companies, but still... There is no reason for me to feel used and abused though... I dunno where I wanna go from here. I really don't.. I just know that I don't want to be here, in this position, any more... When I first started working there 5 years ago, my husband had a good paying job and I didn't NEED to be working but for now, *I* am the main bread winner. Otherwise, they would have had my 2 weeks notice a while ago... I don't get paid nearly enough, don't have any benefits AT ALL, no paid time off, or overtime... Yet, year after year, I have put up with what they dish out...

When I last went to college, I took a poetry course and there was a poem in the text book, that I wish I could find again. In the poem there was a line that went something like "don't let people walk all over you and leave footprints on your forehead"... I had that book for a long long time, I might still have it packed away somewhere, hope I do.. It was a great poem... 

Anyways, I suppose that is enough "poor me" for now. I hope all is well with everyone else...

Been a little bit

It has been a little while since I have blogged... Blogging is a blast and I love doing it but it does take a bit of concentration so that what you say makes sense... What has been going on in my life? Well, my hubby has been coming off of some meds that he has taken for about 10 years... 

About 12 years ago he was in a car accident. He was at a stop in a 55 zone because of a very small unremarkable accident in front of him... There was a girl coming up behind him that didn't see what was going on because she was putting make up on. Therefore, she hit him at 55 mph while he was sitting there. The impact totaled our car. It didn't look bad from the outside but the bolts holding the back seat in the car, were stripped and the engine was killed as well... My hubby's head hyper extended backwards over the head rest and resulted in all the fascia in his upper back being torn.. We have always been very grateful that our 3 month old baby wasn't in the back because the chances of her surviving would have been slim to none...  

My hubby was down for a bit to recover. Eventually he went to physical therapy. However, because of inactivity while he was down, we learned he had a birth defect that results in bone loss of his lower back.. Every time he went to PT for his upper back, it would kill his lower back and vice versa.. Obviously, he had pain meds... Those started to make him sick so the Dr. suggested a couple of alternatives of which my hubby (always thinking ahead) chose the one that cost the least, in case we lost our ins - which we eventually did. 

In any case, he recently decided to give up the pain meds to see just what kind of shape his back was in.. Also because over the years he has lost some time, probably due to the meds.. By that I mean he has periods of time that he can't remember and such... The withdrawals have been harsh at times.. I am amazed he has done so well but I wouldn't want him to go through it again... I am so proud of him though. He is an amazing individual that has overcome many things that a lot of others would not have been able to. I love him so much and I hope that when all is said and done, that we find that his back is not as bad as feared and that he can live his life better than he could while medicated... at least to the extent that he was... 

So, that is what I have been up to, mostly... I hope all of you are doing well!